Superstitions In India – An Eye Opener

Anirban & Arijit, Facts, Humor, Journey, Protest, Story, Supernatural

“A belief which leaves no place for doubt is not a belief; it is a superstition.”

– Jose Bergamin (Spanish Writer, Essayist, Poet)

 

25th August, 2011

Breakfast is over. Checked my bag one last time and put the lunch box inside.

 “Byeee Mom.”
“Bye. Have a safe journey.”

 

Today I really need to reach office by 11:30. Yes, that’s the office time I usually maintain. My boss has now given up and he has stopped looking at his watch after seeing me. Achievement! A slow poisoning indeed. Although confused who finally gets poisoned at the year end!

After getting off the bus at college road crossing, I started waiting for auto. It takes 5 minutes from here to reach my workplace. “Dada, please 2 more minutes. Still 2 seats are vacant. RAJARHAAT RAJARHAAT”. One passenger has left by the time two arrived. The auto started. I’m sitting at the extreme left edge of the front seat. Auto driver is on right side and the middleman is having all fantasies to drive an auto virtually.

Hidco flyover is just 200 meters long. A speeding bus recklessly overtook us on the other side of the slope. “Oye sala bo*ach*da, are you blind?” the driver shouted loudly as he lost control of the auto for a moment. Bus conductor is also exchanging words from distance.

The auto is on 50km/hr speed when I suddenly saw the car in front of us is actually parked! Our driver turned his front wheel sharply and the vehicle got toppled over and all I could remember were sudden lightening flashes in my eyes and some banging metallic sounds.

 

The Blame Game:

– Whom have you first seen in the morning after waking up?
– Did anyone sneeze before you set out?
– Did any cat cross your path? Was it black?
– There was no mention of any accidental event this year in your horoscope. Strange!
– Can you remember any other bad omens on your way?
– Surely you got afflicted by evil eye. We need to take action quickly!

 

Coming Back To Life:

Yes I’m still alive. Very healthy and wise (Intentionally dropped the other word. Can’t trust the IT dept now!) Thanks to my colleagues who saved my ass and other remaining body parts that day. Special mention goes to a friend who literally cried over phone that night for not getting chance to help me as I didn’t inform him.

 

After recovering from external and internal wounds, I invited “Anari Minds” to answer above questions and what I realized made me look like a fool!

 

Tujhe Dekha To Yeh Jana Sanam:

thetruman-show-mirror
Image Source: celebrity-gossip.net

I generally start my day by standing in front of the bathroom’s mirror. The person on other side of it starts his day by seeing my face. We share brush, paste and several “Jim Carrey” moments in the morning. Did he suffer the same consequences like me that day? Then who was the real unlucky one? A matter of debate!

 

Ruk Ja O Dil Deewane:

Dont_Go_Far_Please
Image Source: theartinspiration.com

No one sneezed or called me from my back when I left home that day. For a moment let’s assume any of those happened. If I halted for a minute or two, would it have changed the entire process flow or time sequence equations of rickshaw -> bus -> auto and made the standing car moving? Come on; now don’t bug me with illogical “Final Destination” shits. I can roast it more than you.

 

“Meow” To Raste Se Ja Raha Tha:

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Image Source: hdwallpapersimages.com

Did you ever try finding out what happened to the cat whose path YOU crossed? How such day turned out for him (or her)? A survey tells that humans are more unlucky for cats than in reverse. We hope no extra effort is required to convince you on this. Our evil eyes have no mercy for no reason! You can keep arguing that cats have 9 lives and we have 8 less. But don’t ask if the mentioned survey was conducted by a feline community.

 

What’s Your Rashee:

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Image Source: indiapost.com

We know astrology is a traditional practice. But, does an astrologer know every bloody secret of our lives? Can they explain now why Aztecs failed to replicate the movie 2012 into a reality? We lost a golden opportunity to feature in next Jurrassic Park movie on Human clones rejuvenating from a cockroach nestled in amber. Please don’t be a stoneman to bring back the Stone Age again! A humble request.

 

Hum Kale Hai To Kya Hua Dilwale Hai:

black-cat-001
Image Source: suggestkeyword.com

You say STOP RACISM. Then you ask if the cat was Black to measure the impact of bad omen. Then you put black dot on baby’s face to ward off evil eyes. Again, you demand your hubby to be fare and handsome and avoid the color black on your wedding dress. Then you wear black kohl in the D-day. Enough!! Don’t you hate yourself when you get confused like this?

 

Nimbooda Nimbooda Nimbooda:

lebu lonka
Image Source: ditikotecha.blogspot.com

Do we need to hang Lemon and Chillies charm to avoid evil spirits? Nope. Men will be Men! 😛

In ancient times, it was believed that the thread, which was used to pierce the lemon and 7 chillies, absorbed the juice and became pesticide to keep insects away. If you now want to honour the innocent insects as evil spirits, it’s entirely up to you.

 

Allah Ke Bande Hans De:

AAE
Image Source: fluoridealert.org

We believe in Almighty. We know fanatics will now attack us on all shits we discussed above. But, if a mother of a science student stops her son to have Rasgullas before exam, and compels him to see a glassful of water before leaving home, then only God can help us in this technically superstitious age.

 

Golmaal Hai Bhai Sab Golmaal Hai:

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Image Source: pinterest.com

In 2011, a famous industrialist in Mumbai rejected his newly built $1 billion mansion as it had several “Vasthu” problems.

Our left hands itched and right eyes twitched when we finally cleansed the “Vasthu” of our souls by replacing the Superstitious minds with the free thinking “Anari” minds.

Come, let’s replace yours too!

 

PS – If you don’t share this post with 10 friends within 10 minutes, then a very bad time is on your way as we’ve kept 10 cats ready to cross your path next time. All are Black!

 

Author: Arijit Ganguly

Featured Image Source: flickr.com

8 comments

  • You guys are brave enough to portray such burning topic in an open forum. Kudos!
    I am normally a silent reader, but this time I couldn’t stop myself to appreciate this holy effort.
    Well Done boys!

  • well said. I would like to share something which I have experienced in my small 30 years of life : some persons are to be mentioned as APAYA, if you see him/her your day will be worst or you gonna face a big challenge,this really hurts. Some of our seniors mentioned a particular family member as inauspicious which is really really unacceptable – how we can mention a particular one responsible for all unhappy/ unwanted incidents.

    This is very negative and dark side of our society – no remedy. Also, some people feeling proud to be like that – means being an superstitious! They are unwanted in everyone’s life and make others uncomfortable in their happy lives.

    Again I expressed my thought without hesitation . Hope u guys like it

    • You reminded us of a bengali movie “Patalghar”. It’s only our thinking pattern which compels us to believe in such crap things without asking ‘why’! Sometime we ask, but only to hear a crap logic again. We think the people who mark someone as APAYA, are the biggest APAYAs for our society.

      Enough serious talks. Next week things will be funnier again. 🙂

      No “keep visiting” tag for you as you already do that. 🙂

      Kudos to your free-thinking personality as always!

  • Very rightly said. Weird how in spite of all the scientific advancements, somehow we still believe in all these illogical stuff. Really love the pictures and headlines accompanying this post. The smack of irony was definitely on point! Well done! Keep the cool stuff coming.

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